Natural XX
by Idontdomornings
Summary: Some of the x-men learn to play D&D. While Forge learns that it’s just a game. (In roman numerals X is ten so XX is 20.)


I didn't find any Dungeons and Dragons and X-Men crossovers on here, so I'm going to be the first to write one.

Let the Adventure Begin!

"What are you _doing_?" Kurt asked Forge when he saw the latter sitting at a table, surrounded by books and papers.

"I missed so much." Forge whispered to himself.

"Oh..." Kurt began. "This is about all the stuff you missed being trapped in Middleverse."

"Yes! The settings! The rules! The expansions! I missed it all!" Forge raved.

"Um... what?" Kurt took a step back.

"Dungeons and Dragons! All the new content that came out in the last 30 years!"

"Oh." Kurt paused. "What's Dungeons and Dragons?" Forge stared at Kurt for what felt like an hour.

"How do you _not_ know about Dungeons and Dragons?" Kurt shrugged. "We have to fix this. Immediately."

Three days later, Forge, Kurt, Kitty, Tabitha and Beast were all sitting at a table in the library, all prepared for a game of DD. Beast sat behind the Dungeon Master's screen, and each kid had a character sheet in front of them.

"Okay," Beast started, "let's have everyone take turns describing their character."

"I'll go first!" Forge yelled excitedly. "I am Everard, human wizard. I chose to pursue the study of magic when I witnessed an amazing feat performed by a master conjuror. I travel in search of new spells to further my understanding of the universe!"

"Wow." Kurt mouthed.

"Okay..." Beast moved on. "Kurt, why don't you go next."

"Sure." Kurt agreed. "I'm Nowhere, a tiefling rogue. I steal from the rich and give to the poor."

"Good. Kitty?"

"I'm Ariel, the human fighter." Kitty chimed.

"And I'm Brakka! Half-orc barbarian!" Tabitha interjected.

"Right." Beast continued. "Now you're all starting at level one, so we'll start with something easy."

"What about the _story_?" Forge implored.

"I'm getting to that." Beast cleared his throat. "The four of you have come to the town of Ley-"

"Ley?"

"Yes, Ley. The mayor has sent out requests for adventurers, such as yourselves, to come and slay a horde of goblins that have been plaguing the town for months."

"Goblins? We're fighting _goblins_? But they only have 7 hp." Forge complained.

"Hey, no meta gaming." Beast scolded.

"I'm not! But can we _please_ fight something other than _goblins_?"

"I'm okay with goblins." Kurt said.

"Goblins it is then." Beast declared. Forge groaned. "Now where was I? Oh, yes. You have all gathered at town hall to meet the mayor."

"I thought we fighting goblins?" Tabitha remarked.

"That comes later. First is a bit role playing."

"Role playing?" Kitty asked.

"Yes, it's when you control your characters in the story part of the adventure and interact with the NPCs." Beast explained.

"What's an NPC?" Kurt wondered. Forge face-palmed.

"It stands for Non-player Character." Beast clarified. "Now then, the mayor, a man named Gerald Raymond-"

"Gerald?" Tabitha snickered. Beast ignored her.

"The mayor come into the room and says 'Thank you for coming to rid our town of the terrible goblin horde! I have a map for you all that leads to where we believe their hideout to be.' He holds out the map for one of you to take."

"I like the voice you did for the mayor." Kurt complimented.

"Thank you."

"I'll take the map." Forge said eagerly.

"Okay. The mayor says 'If there is anything you need for your quest don't hesitate to ask.'"

"Healing potions." Forge ordered.

"The mayor rings a bell and a maid comes running in. 'Go to the magic shop, and fetch our heros some healing potions.' 'Right away mister mayor.' The maid replies." The whole group snickered. "What?"

"The maid's voice!" Kurt exclaimed.

"How do you get your voice to go so _high_?" Forge asked.

"Don't make fun of my voices. Now is there anything else you want before you go?"

"When do we get to fight the goblins?" Tabitha questioned. Beast sighed.

"Alright, fine. You receive three healing potions from the mayor and head to the woods, following the map he gave you. You've been walking for about an hour when you decide to stop and rest."

"I roll a perception check!" Forge blurted. "12."

"You look at the map and realize you're lost."

"Aw, what? Nice going Forge." Kitty huffed.

"Can I roll, too?" Kurt asked. Beast nodded. "I rolled a 19."

"What?" Forge yelled, dumbfounded.

"You hear a rustling in the bushes nearby, an instantly recognize it as a goblin."

"_Well_?" Forge asked impatiently.

"Well what?" Kurt replied.

"Are you going to tell the rest of the party, or what?"

"Oh right!" Kurt realized. "There's a goblin in the bushes."

"I cast burning hands!" Forge said immediately.

"What's your DC?"

"13." Forge said proudly. Beast rolled a die behind the screen.

"The goblin's saving throw is... 6. Roll for damage." Forge rolled his dice.

"11." Forge smirked.

"The goblin is dead. And you set the bush on fire."

"Yes! The first kill is mine!" Forge stood up in his chair triumphantly.

"Forge sit down." Beast said.

"Now what?" Kitty asked.

"What do you mean?" Forge asked back.

"We're lost, remember? Don't you think it would have been better to _capture_ the goblin and learn the location of their hideout?" Forge sat down realizing his mistake.

"No way!" Tabitha proclaimed. "I say we burn the whole forest down!"

"That just creates an even _bigger_ problem!" Kurt rebutted.

"Yeah? What's that?"

"A forest fire."

"_Hello_! We have a wizard! He can just put it out with magic."

"Not at my current level." Forge informed.

"Back to square one, then." Kitty sighed.

"So, what are you going to do?" Beast asked playfully.

"I roll investigation." Forge's die landed on 1. He slammed his head onto the table.

"Well I have the Perception skill. We could try that." Kurt rolled his die. "18 plus-"

"You succeeded. Why are you getting such good rolls?" Forge asked, annoyed.

"Okay, you sense the presence of another goblin nearby and point it out to the party. What do you do?" Beast asked.

"Well we're not gonna _kill_ it, that's for sure." Kitty said glaring at Forge.

"I say we grab the little sucker and _force_ him to tell us where the hideout is!" Tabitha made a strangling motion with her hands.

"I think it would be better to follow it back to the hideout." Kurt reasoned.

"Yeah, let's just follow it." Kitty agreed.

"Okay, everyone roll a stealth check." Beast instructed.

"14."

"16."

"14."

"5."

"The goblin hears Everard snap a twig and turns around. What do you do?"

"I'm gonna pick him up and _make_ him tell us where the hideout is!" Tabitha boomed.

"Roll an intimidation check."

"Dirty 20." Tabitha said heroically.

"Of _course_ it is." Forge muttered.

"The goblin faints from terror."

"Oh. Come. On!" Kitty threw her head back in frustration.

"Can I search it when it's unconscious?" Kurt asked. Beast nodded. "Then I'm going to search the goblin."

"Roll investigation." Beast instructed. Natural 20.

"Are you _kidding_ me?" Forge yelled.

"You find a much better written map to the goblin hideout."

"Yay!" Kitty and Kurt both cheered.

"Can I kill it now?" Tabitha asked expectantly.

"I suppose?" Beast said, unsure.

"I slash it's head of with my axe!"

"It's unconscious, so you can't really miss. The goblin is dead. You follow the new map to just outside the hideout entrance."

"Let's just charge in and kill them all." Tabitha suggested.

"It's as good a plan as any." Forge agreed.

"You draw your weapons and charge into the hideout and find 4 goblins gathered around a small table playing cards. They grab their scimitars and attack. Roll initiative."

"17!"

"10."

"16."

"2."

"Alright Kurt, you're first. What do you do?"

"I attack with my rapier." Kurt rolled. "16."

"You land the hit. Roll damage." 8. Forge roared in anger. "Your rapier pierces the goblin's armor and plunges into its heart. It's dead. Tabitha, you're next. What do you-"

"I rage! And slash away at my opponent!"

"Roll to hit."

"17!"

"Roll damage."

"9." Forge groaned.

"The goblin loses its head. Kitty?"

"I attack with my longsword. I rolled a 15."

"Barely hits. Damage?"

"7." Forge banged his head on the table.

"Your sword essentially cuts the goblin in half. Forge, it's your turn." Forge raised his head up.

"I've had it with your beginner's luck! I cast ray of frost." Forge rolled another 1. "Aaaaaaaaahhh!"

"The goblin attacks Everard with its scimitar. What's your armor class?"

"12." was Forge's muffled answer, as he had placed his head back on the table.

"The goblins slashes you for..." Beast rolled. "8 damage."

"What?" Forge stood up, knocking his chair over.

"It's 1d6 plus 2."

"But I only _have_ 8 hp!"

"Oh." Beast paused. "In that case, you're dead." Forge moved to sit down but ended up on the floor. He groaned.

"Now it's Kurt's turn again."

"Well my rapier work well last time." He rolled to attack. "16." He rolled for damage. "7."

"The goblin dies. All the goblins are dead."

"Yes!" Kitty cheered.

"Let's look for treasure!" Tabitha decided.

"You look through the goblins' things and find 12 gold pieces."

"That's 3 for each of us." Kurt chimed.

"Forge is dead." Tabitha corrected.

"4 for each of us then." Kitty said.

"You take the bodies of the goblins and Everard back to the town of Ley and the mayor gives you your reward of 20 gold each. 'Thank you so much for wiping out the goblin horde. You are welcome here anytime.' The end. So what did you kids think? Is D and D fun, or what?" Beast asked with a smile.

"Yeah!" Everyone but Forge cheered.


End file.
